Wake Up, Lia! is a budget precision platformer published by EastAsiaSoft. The premise revolves around Lia’s nightmares, bullying, and all sorts of other trauma but the player will also experience all negative emotions playing this game.
The goal is simple. Reach the exit without dying but all the stereotypical hazards are in your way: mostly spikes, swinging blades, and spinning circular saws. In fact, these are pretty much the only obstacles to avoid so repetition sets in quickly. As I was taking notes for this article while playing, I paused the game and counted nearly a dozen pointy things on the screen at one time. So many spikes!
The spikes aren’t necessarily the biggest problem though. It is the positioning of the spikes that makes this dark campaign frustrating and never fun. Lia’s sprite is also too big for the stage design, and she can only jump at one height. There are some sections with low-ceiling swinging ax pendulums that I don’t think can be cleared. I got to a stage somewhere in World 2 and could not beat it as there simply isn’t enough height for Lia’s big head to clear. This is when I rage quit and deleted the game from my harddrive. Also, at the time of this article, exactly zero players unlocked any Achievement beyond level 2 which means I am not the only one to get stuck at this impossible section. The checkpoint system is also spotty at best as it can send the player back to annoying lengths.
Some stages also require slight backtracking. However, once you hit the switch to open the passageway, it is easier and faster to kill yourself to restart at the checkpoint than backtrack the lousy stage design. So you know it is bad when it is better to suicide then struggle with the design. On top of that, the controls are slippery. I died many times because Lia falls off ledges when you get too close. In other words, the player isn’t granted any precision in this precision demanding platformer. The juxtaposition between the brightly colored Lia sprite against the drab backgrounds doesn’t look right even if it was purposely done for thematic purposes.
The music and sound effects are also terrible, and I had to turn it off before I deleted the game. It is supposed to provide a sense of dread or scariness but instead just makes you want to quit playing even faster.
Wake Up, Lia! might be the worst EastAsiaSoft published title I’ve played. Which says a lot because most of their library is rather excellent. This game offended me and made me genuinely angry due to its poor design and lack of consideration for the player.
SCORE: 2/10
By: Zachary Gasiorowski, Editor in Chief myGamer.com
X/Twitter: @ZackGaz
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